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My friend Nwabisa, ‘the hot mess’ (her official title) who blogs here, asked me if I’m over my “ship” yet. I remembered the conversation vaguely and thought she meant my current crush. It was something similar, but a lot more insane.

Alright, here goes… I’m in a ship. This is not easy for me to admit, because I have judged Nwabisa for her own shipping ways.
A ship, as she explained it, is a vicarious relationship with a fictional couple. Here’s a little description from Wiki:
Shipping, derived from the word relationship, friendship or worship, is the belief of (or desire for) two (or more) people, often fictional, to be in a romantic relationship. It is considered a general term for fans’ emotional involvement with the ongoing development of romance in a work of fiction.
When we established that she was asking me about Patrick and Richie from the HBO series Looking, and not vicarious delusional relationship, it all fell into place. Some excerpts from her in our convo:
“You’re almost a true shipper! Next you’ll be arguing with folks on forums””Have you googled them at least? Look for like minded individuals who feel the same way about your ship?”

The she asked me if Patrick and Richie are “canon”? (Oh boy, jargon)

She said: 

A ship that is officially recognised by the show. The opposite is fanon. When a pairing is created by fans but is not suggested by the show. They are not an official pairing with a chance of actually ending up together.Ron and Hermione are canon. Snape and Hermione are fanon.

She’s just a wee bit obsessed.

So my ship is with Patrick and Richie *sigh* Yes, I’m already sighing.  This image sums up how I felt watching them
I'm the guy in blue.

I’m the guy in blue.

The series garnered a fair amount of press – any “gay” show would. But this one got people upset because it was so “normal” and “boring”. I was a fan for the exact opposite reason. Having missed the “Queer as Folk” era and being a big huge fan of Will and Grace, I love when a TV show is focused (or heavily so) on gayness. Nay sayer critics would probably argue against this as we need to move on, and other idealistic fantasies, but minorities need focus too. And to me, anything gay, “good or bad” is great to me simply because of its subversive nature.
And that brings me to my ship, as I *sigh* again.
Richie and Patrick made me believe again. Patrick is annoying as all hell, but the fortuitous nature of their meeting, the way that they got together and got back together despite a little drama, and then stayed together for a while made me swoon like nothing else in a while.
Why this ship means so much to me? They were so blissfully happy! It may have been a fleeting moment in television series time, but it seemed and felt so real. I connected to their conversations and stolen glances, the way they opened up to each other, the laughter and quiet moments between conversations.
The adage about art reflecting life could not have been more true with this ship. I now concede that I was unfair in judging other ships, even when I did not know they were called ships.
Episode 5 was such perfection that i go back to it every so often when i want love inspiration.  Read this for the best insight ever into that episode, but I would add that the relaxed nature of what they experienced – from the sex to conversation – despite Patrick’s neurotic behaviour, made this one such a treat to watch. When things turned sour, I felt it, like a knife to my ribs. I even clutched my heart and gasped at certain points. I’m dramatic, can you tell?
Love the one you’re with, and if you cant, then love yourself. But also, if you cant love yourself, then love the ones you’re watching.
You cant tell me you don’t want that. And if you cant have it, at least get it from a fantasy, right? Right?!
<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

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