Just another WordPress.com site

Posts tagged ‘government’

Gallery

The 6th Zuma Wife, or something.

First of all, Happy 70th Birthday to my love, Mr President. For you, a prezzie for my Prezzie.

Let me start with a disclaimer. Or rather, a warning, if you must. Reading this post could place you in a sticky situation, as it does me every so often. This is strictly need to know, and by participating, you do so at your own risk.

I, my dear friends, family and faithful bloggettes, am the 6th Zuma wife. You could say Im the sixth lady of the glorious Republic of South Africa. Don’t worry, it will all make sense soon. I do not actually know exactly how many others there are of my fellow wives (or colleagues as we call ourselves) there are, because I am kept in, and on, the dark. This is partly due to the security risk. I insist that Zooms (one of my many pet names for him) does not spend tax payer’s money on me. Rather I insist on him allowing others to spend said money on me.  How else do you think I am supposed to get a car, house and botox injections? By getting a job?! Please do not insult me; im practically royalty. Although I do get my way through a variety of jobs.

The complexities of this relationship are made harder (!) by the fact that I am not a public figure. Although I have yet to meet Barack and Michelle, I have been introduced to Vlad and Dmitri. And Phil and Liz (the Winds’s as we jokingly call them) were delightful. Unfortunately I was known as a butler, or assistant or whatever, but this is ok. Love knows no bounds.

What JayJay and I have is special and I would not swap it for all the Zim dollars in the world. And in case you are wondering, NO, he is not, you know, that g-word. There exists no such word in our home, or culture.  Why I have decided to come out now with this revelation? We are moving forward as a nation. I respect my husband and the decisions that he and our colleagues make, and therefore have decided to get it in now before we get muzzled. Well, Jay-Zee and Jay-Me do an assortment of muzzling exercises but talking about that would be tacky, now wouldn’t it?

This is a love that must be shared. We are timeless and this will last forever. Like Elizabeth and Richard, Brad and Jen and the other couples in the magazines he brings me from his overseas travels. What a great man, right?

 

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

Advertisements

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: