Just another WordPress.com site

Posts tagged ‘lessons’

Gallery

Nothing is a waste

This is an adage I’ve grown to believe in more than anything, especially in my career. However, it also applies to so many other facets of life.

We are so fixated on success and validation that we forget the steps that it took to get there. Considering anything as a waste is, essentially, a waste.

Nature is one of our greatest teachers – it is simple, efficient, self-serving, and to be literal, self-sustaining. We see and know this. Yet we humans have yet to embrace this concept. A leave falls to the ground and instead of wondering what a waste it is and how its photosynthetic-earning potential is now gone, it simply wafts down to fertilise a new tree.

Crying because my article did not get published may feel justified, but that is the true waste. Instead, I wrote an article and learned something about the subject and I honed my research, writing and interviewing skills. (prepare for more dramatic emphases) The ultimate feeling of validation really should come from you, but instead we look to the outside for that pat on the head (or whatever else it is that makes you smile).

Time wasted is time spent, that did not go the way that you expected. The fault, or rather the lesson, ultimately lies with you for having the expectation in the first place and opening yourself up to disappointment.

Now that you know, I hope you learn.

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

Advertisements

Lessons from Marco

Today is pretty much a copy and paste job, but so worth it. Marco is one of my dear friends, and yesterday on his 23rd birthday, he decided to share 23 lessons on his Twitter. The nature of our friendship is wholly inappropriate, but all about love, so I’m trying my best to not slip in a genital joke here, seeing as he kept it so classy. He’s also an avid reader, and regular follower f this blog. So this is a well-deserved shout-out. When I phoned to wish him, he said that he realized that some of them were clichés, but I say “Boo you whore!”, they are fantastic!

You all know that I’m all about a good lesson. So here are the 23 lessons from Marco:

#23 dont drink more than one cup of good filter coffee.

#22 throw caution to the wind… but beware the wind doesnt blow in the wrong direction…

#21 age is really only a number no matter what ignorant people tell you. But…act your age. When its done its gone

#20 give. Give until you cant. Then give some more.

#19 be aware of who you are in and outside of what others perceive you to be. You are your own ambassador.

#18 Take a moment. Breath. Theres more to life than notifications.

#17 find someone that you can trust. It takes a lot of bruising at first but once you find that person… never let go.

#16 family is everything. Find yours wherever you need to and live for them.

#15 be nice. There are no points for winning arguments. Even when youre right.

#14 dont diet. Your body is yours take care of. The key is balance.

#13 work smart. Hardworkers usually get a lot done. Smart workers get it done right.

#12 dont compare yourself. Everyone has their own journey and yours is up to you by you FOR you.

#11 money isnt the root of all evil. Allowing it to rule you is.

#10 dont burn bridges. The world is getting smaller and constantly turning. Some day that friend will be needed.

#9 take care of something. A plant a pet a family member. Take the attention away from you.

#8 try. Whenever things look out of reach keep trying. Failure is only a guide to the right destination. Success.

#7 silence is mandatory. You need time to reflect before you speak or sleep or leave. It makes interacting easier.

#6 find yourself before you go looking for love. You kinda need the one before the other.

#5 fads never last. You dont have to own everything to OWN EVRRYTHING.

#4 the truest beauty is found beyond the chiselled features of good bone structure. Focus on what matters.

#3 love deeply love truly but never love freely. Not everyone you befriend is friendly. Take some time to forge bonds

#2 dont take life too seriously. Its transitory so shits bound to happen. Let it. Then learn from it.

MarcoWorld @ph03nikz  ·  15h

#1 Do unto others as…you would LIKE them to do unto you… Even when/if they dont. Especially 🙂

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

Nothing is a waste

This is an adage I’ve grown to believe in more than anything, especially in my career. However, it also applies to so many other facets of life.

We are so fixated on success and validation that we forget the steps that it took to get there. Considering anything as a waste is, essentially, a waste.

Nature is one of our greatest teachers – it is simple, efficient, self-serving, and to be literal, self-sustaining. We see and know this. Yet we humans have yet to embrace this concept. A leave falls to the ground and instead of wondering what a waste it is and how its photosynthetic-earning potential is now gone, it simply wafts down to fertilise a new tree.

Crying because my article did not get published may feel justified, but that is the true waste. Instead, I wrote an article and learned something about the subject and I honed my research, writing and interviewing skills. (prepare for more dramatic emphases) The ultimate feeling of validation really should come from you, but instead we look to the outside for that pat on the head (or whatever else it is that makes you smile).

Time wasted is time spent, that did not go the way that you expected. The fault, or rather the lesson, ultimately lies with you for having the expectation in the first place and opening yourself up to disappointment.

You were warned, now I hope you learn.

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

Gallery

Gay Bar Lessons

No, this is not (only) the name of the porn film into which I was tricked in to starring, again. On Friday I was out again, for the first time in a long time. It was actually a drag bar, to be precise. I think.

Ok, let me get this straight, and then I’ll revert again. The site was Bubbles, the bar in Greenpoint where resident queen Vida Fantabisher performs. She… is… stunning! The consummate lady in a dress who puts any woman to shame, and rightly so. She flounces around between lip-synching sets and does little witty repartees with the patrons.

This establishment has been under new management many times. I must say that I prefer this incarnation the most. It seems less pretentious than the other bars it used to be.

“The scene”, however, as the mostly nightlife of the gay community of a city is called, has not changed much. Refer to older posts in this “Gender and Sexuality” category for my fragmented stance on this community for a broader and more confused perspective. I will say that it is a stereotype from afar, and usually remains such until one zooms in. I had a more substantial night with two sets of great guys, with wining and whining in unequal doses.

But on to the lessons. I know people, me included, who are so sick of the judgement and superficiality of this scene. It was present again when I was there, but I saw it with new eyes. I have to admit that I do judge, yet I try to remain conscious of it. But after being locked away and focusing on my studies, I felt like an outsider. This was of course my own doing. It was also thanks to a friend telling me I dance like a robot [you’re an asshole Bradley]

We all want to be loved and accepted. Nearly everyone at a club is self-conscious. Everyone also denies it. We all want to fit in. And that’s ok.

There was a bet going around that night. A man, who was recently divorced, made a bet with someone that they would try to kiss as many people as possible in 15 minutes. Crazy, right? Or just the nature of the game? Again, I found myself judging until I thought, “Why not?!” I didn’t kiss anyone, but more power to him. However you want to extract your diamond of love from the coal of this world, play on players.

We all want our own space to be free. When I used to go clubbing a few years ago, I had “friends” with whom I would only interact in the club. When I saw someone from those days recently, it made me realise how we had absolutely nothing in common besides “I love this song” and “see you next week.”

Expecting people to feel the same freedom is unfair. I feel this freedom in myself. Or at least I try to as often as possible. Others need a space of their own, especially if not provided that space in the “real” world. If your family, friends and most of society is constantly knocking you down, a dark room with flashing lights and alcohol is pretty much the best thing ever. Standing in the back, I saw this for the first time with a new perspective.

This is, of course, still not an excuse to lose one’s self in this setting. Before I go on and on about consciousness again, I just think that we should be aware of how we navigate these spaces. You don’t want to wake up a few years later only to realise that instead of making a few meaningful connections, you made many semi meaningful ones. It happens, especially without awareness. You see, that wasn’t too preachy.

Overall it was a good night and one I’d like to do again without the head full of thoughts and bad back.

Thank you Bubbles and Miss Fantabisher. I salute you.

 

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: