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The New Secret Earth to Happiness* (reading this will change your life)

So I’ve been trying this positive thinking and laws of attraction thing.

I have spoken a bit about my love for my lover Eckhart Tolle and his genius that is A New Earth. I’ve only read that one about 16, 000 times, but with this particular mood that I’m in, well, I’m in no mood.

You see, I have friends who are really cynical. They think that all this new age philosophy stuff is bullshit. “It just preaches things you already know!” said a fat boy whose body I love, yet who pisses me off most days. At the time I disagreed with him.

The cynic in me (who is for once, not an actual person who is cynical, but the cynical part of me) detests the work that goes with this way of living. Both A New Earth as well as that other gem The Secret requires awareness, presence and consciousness to get to this place of awakened doing. My problem is that I don’t often have what it takes to get to the place where I can practise these things in the first place to get to that place of awakened whatever…

Askies if this appears that I am going on a Mad King George raging rant, but really now, why is it so hard? This is a question which I usually ask with a straightish face on the set of the small budget “films” that I frequent. However this is serious.

The other day I woke up and forgot to chant “I am happy I am happy I am happy” before I brushed my teeth. As a result when I was introduced to someone, I said “Hi, I am not Happy”, fell to the ground and broke down as I held on to their knees. This left a sour taste in my mouth and slimy snail trail on the ground where I was dragged from the scene.

 You see what happens when you don’t stay conscious, awake, present in the moment and conscious? DO YOU SEE PEOPLE? No really, do you see? I just fell asleep. Darn it, I missed out again!

I’m sure there is relevance and significance in this method, but right now I think I’m too much of a fuddy duddy to do it. There’s that saying about rock bottom being the spring board to kick yourself back up to the top. But the brilliant mind that came up with that one obviously doesn’t have my weak legs and was not wearing hooker heels when he fell in the pool.

But don’t mind me, once I am done spewing I shall get right back to it. This post was a good reminder that no matter how exhausting, we must always remind ourselves to get to a place of stillness; and silliness. That way you can listen to all the voices in your head and they can converse with others. How else do you think I met my other personalities?

*warning: extreme sarcasm can lead to partial blindness and mental impotence.

 

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

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