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6th Zuma Wife discusses the Olympics

With all this Olympic fever, I was inspired to write about my own Olympic God and the games that are the life of the 6th Zuma wife.

As a wife to the first citizen of this mildly average nation, I was as caught up as everyone else when we won those golds and silver. We are currently number 13 in the world, which made Jay-Zu a very happy man indeed. He let me out of my kraal for the night and we went for gold ourselves.

This is a momentous time for South Africa. As a woman of grace and splendour, and also as a man, I am honoured to be holding the spear of the nation up and keeping the flame lit on this side of the equator. Someone has to do it and I am partially grateful for this accomplishment.

Many judge us and our lifestyle. However I do want us to move forward as a nation and forget about our interesting relationship. As I have said on this blog before, it is hard work to keep it hard. Do not judge us until you can walk a metre in our shoes.

The wives, Jakie and I were supposed to travel to London together and revel in the games. But you know men, JJ got a little nervous when I saw those five rings and wanted five rings of my own.

So I’m still at home, trying to escape to the main house. The recent renovations have left me relegated to a kraal even further back in the compound.  At least we get a taste of our own Olympics over here. Angie Moshoeshoe, Minister of Education or something, proved that we don’t do anything in half measure is this country.  And with all the wet weather, there will be a lot of new swimmers for the next Olympics.

Just looking through the bars of the compound, I saw about 300 refugees swimming upstream in the river. Minister Dlamini-Zuma, that bitch, better not neglect her duties over here now that she’s in charge of the AU.  It’s bad enough that she’s the original “first wife”, making the rest of us look bad. Bronze medal for her.  The least she can do is get these immigrants registered asap so we can use them for something other than building our new security wall.

Julius gets the gold in my books for tenacity. He tried competing with the kids in a little mini-Olympics on the front lawn of the compound and the poor dear ran out of steam after the first event. He placed 35 out of 36. I think Jacob let him win, or he also collapsed from exhaustion.

Let’s hope that SA can keep flying that flag high. We are all proud of you.

PS: if any of you are interested, the Zuma household now welcomes new applications. We are set for a new wife.

<p>Author <a href=”https://plus.google.com/102128103971030481396” target=”blank” rel=”author”>Jerome Cornelius</a></p>

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